Monday, February 17, 2014

We are back home

For reasons I can not go into right now... I just wanted everyone to know that Mom is back home with us and is no longer at the Live In Facility.

I may at some point chose to share our horror story, but right now... I am opting out publishing anything.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Visitor From an Old Friend

Monday 2/10/13

I received a text message from a "great friend" of ours that mom bonded with at the Daycare.
She was there by our side the day that we moved mom into the facility and has kept in touch with us ever since. She texted me on Monday and asked me if, she still had visitation rights :)

Of course she does.. So she went a spent some time with mom. Honestly I was not sure if she would remember her or not. But she said that mom recognized her as soon as she walked in.

She brought mom an milkshake (since we are trying to put a few lbs. back on her) and I think that she brought herself some lunch, which I think that she ended up sharing with mom even though mom had just finished lunch. Listen... You bring fries you better be prepared to share... :)

It was nice that she took the time out of her schedule to go and see mom. I really appreciated it.
It also allowed me to pick her brain on how she thinks mom is doing, since she knew mom before placement and also understand this disease.

The only things that mom informed her of was that she was not too sure about the food choices and she does not like it at night when the facility gets dark. Meaning bedtime.
(The care managers have asked me to bring a lamp in to place in moms room, so that they can leave a light on for her. That lamp has now made it out of the closet where it was being store, to now being located in a bag by the front door. One day in the near future, hopefully I will remember to take it to my dang car). Really how hard is it to remember a lamp sitting next to the front door!

Moms lips were really dry and cracked on Monday night so I asked G to stop and pick up from Chap Stick on his way to see mom that night. He texted me later when he was there to say how excited she got about the Chap Stick when he pulled it out of his pocket for her.
I asked him to leave it with the care managers to put on her lips morning and night. (I did notice on Tuesday night, that her lips looked much better).

Tuesday 2/11/13- Marks One Month

Tuesday was one month since we placed mom. I tried hard to reflect on the changes that have occurred with mom since she has been placed. Honestly.. I am still not sure that this is the right decision for mom or for myself.

I left work a little bit later than normal so I arrived when mom was already sitting for dinner. I walked into her taking someone else's soup, and another lady standing up bossing everyone at the table.
I asked if I could move mom to the back table so that I could sit with her and also remove her from the group of lady's that was setting her off.
We relocated ourselves to the back table and I sat with her while she ate. She did good eating.
For whatever reason mom has decided that she no longer likes dessert. She will not even try them form the facility.

Her ADD demeanor was out in full force. I even checked with the medication nurse to be sure that she has been taking her medicine. According to him, yes there are no indications that she had refused it on her file. Good days and Bad Days right??????

Wednesday 2/12/13-

I had a procedure this morning on my neck again to help with the headaches. I had to lay flat after the procedure for 4 hrs, so I was not able to go and see mom today. G has the flu, so he is also staying away.
This is the first day that neither G nor myself were able to go and see her. I called and talked to her after dinner and she seemed good. She said that she was OK, just watching TV with her friends.
I talked to her care manager that said she ate well and has been in a good mood.

I WILL BE THERE TOMORROW. Ain't No headache going to keep me from my momma!

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Bad start, turns into a postive note

This week has been filled with emotions I have not felt in a long time.

I had to try really hard to find a balanced between work and home life. It doesn't happen too often, but when work needs be... They really need me.

I have been working all week at least until 7 and also having to be in the office by 7:30. I had a conference  Wednesday - Friday that also required that I attend after work functions.

I like to always go and see mom in the morning before I go into work, which means that I usually do not get into the office until around 8:45-9. This week I was not able to go and see mom for breakfast at all and had to rush to even see her at dinner time in between leaving the office going to the dinner functions.

As I mentioned in last weeks blog post, we have noticed that mom has lost some weight. I requested on Monday that she be weighed and to let me know what her weight was. By Wednesday when she had still not be weighed, I took matters into my own hands.
I went and got the chair scale myself and set it up right smack in the middle of the living room for all of the staff to see what was being done.
I was shocked to see that mom had lost 9 pounds since she had been to the Dr. right before she moved in. She is down to 139...
Lets be honest mom and I both could live weeks off of the fat on our hips alone, but that is not the point.
The point in this entire story is that once again, I had to bring it to everyone's attention. I just don't understand why.
First: The wrong medication being given. Second: The wrong dosage of medication. Third: The bully and now this...
The medication has been taken care of and I give them credit. Mom does not go more than a few hrs with refusing to take her medication before they call me to let me know. I think that they learned their lesson that her refusing to take her medication and them not forcing it and not telling us for two days will not happen with me involved.. I will chew someone up!
The medication Tech has been pretty successful and for that I give them a thumbs up... Mom can be how to say it... A pain in the @$$ when it comes to taking medication.

The care managers seem to have started to bond with me. Which is good. I always make it a point to know EVERYONES name. I always want them to feel a connection with us. When you address people by there name, they seem to think twice.

Bridget has found that when mom does not have the baby doll with her at the table she does not get distracted and eats better. Also they said that she is not bonding or socializing with the other residents and that they expected her to by now. Again when they take the baby away, she talks to the other residents and not just to the baby.

The minute I walk onto the floor, they always tell me how much at each setting mom ate. It seems to be getting better.
I talked to Carrie today and requested that mom be weighed weekly until we get a handle on the weight loss. They will be scheduled to weigh her every Thursday.

I had a bad headache on Saturday, so laid around on the couch until it was close to mid-afternoon. I got a phone call from the facility and expected it to be the hairdresser, telling me that mom would not let them do her hair. Or that she was freaking out about the water in her ears and that I needed to be there for her appt.
But it was the nurse... She said that she wanted to call me and let me know that mom hurt her knee. She said that mom was having trouble putting any weight on it and was stumbling when she walked.
They did not see any swelling or bruising, but that they put her in a wheelchair just to be on the safe side as they did not want her to fall. But she did not want me to not be aware and walk into visit her and see her in a wheelchair and freak out.
Shawn and I left the house shortly after that call...

When we arrived Bridget was downstairs and rode up with me in the elevator. I asked her what was going on with mom. She said I don't know, I asked the nurse when I came on shift and saw her sitting in the wheel chair. She said I asked the nurse if she had called you yet, and the nurse said no... But that her sift was ending. Bridget told her that she had to call me before she left, that Bridget was not going to tell me that she had no idea what was wrong with mom and why she was in a wheelchair when I came to visit.
After the nurse called me, she said to Bridget she (me) was nice.. Bridget said, I never said she was not nice.. I just said that I was not going to be the one to tell her that I didn't know what was wrong with her mom... :)
Shawn checked mom over and said that she probably hit it on something or that maybe she turned funny on it. He saw no swelling or bruising, and it did not appear that she had fallen.  We got her cleaned up and ready for bed and tucked her in before leaving for the night.

Sunday we picked Pop up and took him to the International Car Show downtown. We walked around looking at all the new cars for 2014 for about 3 hrs and then went to the Landing to have lunch.
It was the WORST lunch ever.... I still feel sick from it.. It was so gross.
We took Pop back to his apt and then went to see mom. She was finishing up with dinner when we got there. She is not needing the wheelchair and has made a miraculous recovery from her knee injury. We took her and cleaned her up (Changed her depends and had her go to the bathroom) and then sat with her in her apt from about an hr.
We then took her back out into the living room to sit with all of the other residents to watch the Olympics before getting ready for bed.

Monday, February 3, 2014

1/29/14-2/3/14 These few days have been a whirl wind

The last few days have been a whirl wind. Between me not feeling well and there being a stomach bug going around mom's floor...... I have not spent a whole lot of time there.

Friday I worked from home just because I felt like @$$ when I woke up I didn't even feel like getting dressed to go into the office.
I worked in my PJ's all day (not that, that is anything different from any other day that I work from home. Hey- They are comfy... Don't judge me)

I worked until about 3:30 and then forced myself to at least put on some "real" clothes and go and see mom. She was as usual sitting in the living room watching Annie (I'm going to HATE that freakin movie, by the time this is all done) holding her baby. I spent sometime just sitting with her, listening to her ramble about what.. I'm not really sure :) But it makes her happy....
I was going to leave when they started to get everyone together for dinner, but G showed up as he had left work early and came by to see her as well. So we all had dinner together....

The mean lady tried to take mom's baby again and G had to hold her off, telling her over and over again this is not your baby... This is my moms baby. He did better than me..
I said to G, lets go to the other dinning room so we can get away from this lady, since she is on this side of the floor, I'm sure she will eat over here.

I WAS WRONG... She followed us yelling the whole time to the other side of the floor. G and I sat mom down at a table with a view with only 4 chairs. I wanted us to be able to sit with her alone.

The lady followed us to the table and stood over us for about 3 minutes, before I could not take it any more. I said Come with me... G said don't hurt her :) I wont... MUCH

I said to her come with me... She turned to follow me and I stuck out my hand which she took. She walked with me holding my hand into the living room. I took her to the crib station that they have set up and showed her that "her babies" were still in the crib. She was so happy. She snatched that baby up by her foot and held her tight. Good thing it was not a real baby.:)

She left us alone the rest of the night.....

Dinner went OK. Mom seems to get really distracted when we are there with her during eating time. But on the other hand, if we are not there.. She does not eat much.

She refused to take her medicine when the lady came to give it to her. G reached out and got the medication cup and said that we would give it to her. G tired a few times to try and she kept telling him no... It was so hard for me not to take the cup and handle it..... But I need to let him handle thing sometimes. I have to stop trying to take control of everything. He did well he kept at it and got them down her with only minimal bribes :) What ever it takes now a days... I could careless.
I bribe with M&M's and I tell the girls at the facility to do the same.

Saturday was a fun day for all of us........
Patti and Krista Gold (mom's niece) were in town visiting Jennifer who is my cousin who is living in my parents condo (FYI- Thank god for that.... One less thing we had to worry or stress about).
I was going to go and bust mom out and meet them all for lunch, but Shawn got back from the gym earlier than expected so he and Pop also went with us...
So we all went to lunch at the Ale House (Dad's favorite) to have lunch.
It was nice for mom to get out and to spend time with friends away from the facility. Not sure she knew who everyone was... But she loved to talk and be out. Patti brought a gift for mom from Gale and Dick. She pulled a picture out of the bag that Gale has sent up and mom immediately said that's Dick... I was shocked....
She had no clue who she was in the photo, or who Dad or Gale was... But Dick she knew.

We spent about two hours at lunch and then we took mom back.... I asked Shawn was he was going to do when he got home.. He said sleep, I've been up since 4am....First off that is your own fault... But if your going home to sleep, drop me off at the mall with the girls and I will see you later.

So not only did I get to spend the afternoon with mom, I also got to spend some time shopping....

I took a day off... G told me that he was going to see mom and wanted to make sure that I was not  going to check her out. So I opted to stay home today and clean my house... it was really needed...

*** One thing that I did want to mention, was to me mom seems to have gone downhill over the last week or so. She is really slow responding now and is also really making no sense at all when she talks. I am not sure if this is from lack of stimulation (little to no activities to use the brain), if this is adjusting from the move, or is this a slide or progression in the disease. I don't know, but it scares the hell out of me. There is a big difference in my opinion in a short amount of time*******